Sometimes, it's true, I mother with the wrong kind of fear. Well, perhaps, it is more often than I realize or care to admit.
I fear sometimes that I am totally ruining my children, that I don't do enough for them or that I do too much for them, that I am too controlling or not controlled enough., that I am not consistent enough or that I keep things too regimented.
I fear sometimes to let them out of my sight and sometimes I fear they see too much of me.
I fear sometimes what others will think of the way I am mothering or what they will think about how my children are turning out.
I fear sometimes that I am just not good enough. Or that we have made the wrong choices for our family.
I could go on, but you see how it is.
I also know that I am not the only one. I have had these conversations with too many other mothers to know I am not alone on this.
But, it is the wrong kind of fear.
God commanded Noah to build an ark to save himself and his family from the flood. The flood that God was going to send to wipe out the existence of every living thing on the earth because of the wickedness of man and the evil in his heart.
Noah did exactly as God commanded Him and was saved from the flood and received blessing from God.
And He did it with fear.
Definitely not the fear that comes to mind when we think of impending danger or of how we will look absolutely ridiculous if we do something out of the ordinary from the culture we live in.
It was a fear of God ~ a reverential fear that made him go ahead with what God told him to do even in spite of the world's mocking disbelief. His respect for God was such that He obeyed even when the events were unseen and he knew that what God said would happen would surely transpire and what God promised would precisely be fulfilled.
God commanded him to 'construct an ark for the saving of his household.'
He did this by faith!
Noah obeyed and when it was finished he not only took the animals in two by two to be saved from the waters, but also his family went with him into the ark.
Noah was 'in the ark'. He is called righteous because of his faithful response.
In the same way, we, by faith alone, by God's grace can be 'in Christ.' Our children will need to be called and receive God's grace by faith alone, but we have a wonderful opportunity to lead our children to Christ.
"The believing parent must live, act, and pray with and for his children, as one who is assured that his children are meant of God to be there in the ark with him. Let us confidently trust God for the salvation of every child. Let us instruct and inspire our children with this thought in mind." (p.23 emphasis mine)In fact, just as Noah was promised that he and his household would be saved from the waters of judgement, an act of grace, so God desires this for our children.
"Abide in Christ and let the child feel that to be near you is to be near Christ. Live in the power of the love and the life of Christ.' (p.23 emphasis mine)In Christ, I can love my children with the love of God. If love is the greatest then I need to ask God to fill me with His perfect love for it casts out fear.
I sometimes fear . . . I often fail . . . but by grace, in faith I can claim the promises that God has given for me and my children.
And by faith, I can mother these children that God has entrusted to me, with a reverential fear that leads to obedience that will honour Christ and bring blessing to me and my children.
A Mother's Prayer
"O Lord, I have heard your message telling me that since you have accepted me as righteous in Your Son, You want my children to be saved, too. I have heard your voice of grace, saying, "Come thou into the ark, and thy house." Thank You for the assurance that this promise gives to a parent's heart! Lord, open my eyes to see what Your Word can teach me. Let me see in Noah the picture of a believing parent--walking with You, believing Your Word, obedient to Your command. Let me see in the ark the type of my blessed Lord Jesus . . . Help me to believe the promise of Your grace and to obey Your command. Help me to perform the work entrusted to me so that Your blessing may abide on me and my children. May it all be to the glory of Your Holy Name. Amen."(p.24)
*****
There's a little book, 'Raising Your Children for Christ' by Andrew Murray, on my shelf that I keep bringing down and leafing through and, Lord willing, on Wednesdays I hope to share snippets of my gleanings from it.
I don't claim to know all the answers. I need to dig deeper so that I can be even more equipped to be the mother that God intended. I am so thankful that this task of raising our children has not been given to me alone.
Is there something in your life that makes mothering hard?
Join me on this journey? It is not a list of rules and how-to's but rather a chance to look into your own life and heart and be challenged to live a life wholeheartedly devoted to the Lord.
Is there something in your life that makes mothering hard?
Join me on this journey? It is not a list of rules and how-to's but rather a chance to look into your own life and heart and be challenged to live a life wholeheartedly devoted to the Lord.
For the first post in this series on Intentional Motherhood you can find it here.
For all posts in this series you can read them here.
I struggle with the same wrong fear. My mother once told me that my mistakes will create a hole that only God can fill in each of my children. It breaks my heart some days, that I cannot be perfect, unconditionally loving, perfectly parenting. Yet to know there is a Parent who will never fail them...this is to drink deep from the wellspring of Grace and put my face to the ground in thanksgiving for all my Savior offers...to me AND my children.
ReplyDeleteYes,I am glad you mentioned that! I am so thankful that my children's lives are in the Palm of His hands. Drinking from the wellspring of Grace here!
DeleteOh, yes, Momma....I think we all have that fear. I often find myself challenged knowing that I need God's love through me to truly love my kids, but that requires taking some quiet time just for me and God to sit and spend time together. And with 3 little ones....that can be hard. Thank you for this reminder!
ReplyDeleteThanks for this post. A gentle but needed reminder.
ReplyDeleteIn His Grip,
Monica
http://happyandblessedhome.com
This was beautiful, Rebekah. Thank you for sharing your heart with me!
ReplyDeleteI struggle with that four letter word often... and YES! Love casts out fear (I wrote about that recently, too -- my we are kindred!)
Thrilled to be getting to know you via (in)couragers! {HUGS}