Jehovah was not in the wind. And after the wind, an earthquake: Jehovah was not in the earthquake.
And after the earthquake, a fire: Jehovah was not in the fire. And after the fire, a soft gentle voice. (1Kings 19:11-12)

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Friday, April 12, 2013

Here, on a Friday: Twelve Things on the Eve of Your Twelfth Birthday








I finished my last day of work a dozen years ago today.

I thought I had about 10 days to finish getting my life in order for what was to come next. I was on my own that night, googling all kinds of information I thought for sure I would need to know when you arrived.

But, you decided to come before I had a chance to finish nesting, or pack my bags, or figure out how to be a mother.

I stayed up way too late that night. Then after an hour of sleep, I woke up and as I saw that you were not going to wait to the due date, your Daddy walked in the door from work. It was one in the morning, he was tired and was sure that I was in false labour.

I laboured alone all night with increasing intensity. At times the pain would be too much to bear alone, so I'd wake him to convince him that I was pretty sure this was it!

After nine hours I knew I had to make my way to the hospital. When the nurse admitted me, your Daddy finally believed that you were on your way!

It was a long, slow labour and I managed without any medication to dull the pain, although I screamed and screamed and made sure everyone knew that it hurt!

You were born on a Good Friday!



Here we are, a Friday, the eve of your 12th birthday.

Google never could have prepared me for your arrival into my life.

I read and read thinking that books would make it easier and that information would make it fool-proof, but I was wrong.

God used a daughter to teach a mother things you have taught me.

You. My Daughter.

That I have to bend down low, even when it hurts, even when I feel like I am doing it alone.

I have to breath.

I have to relax.

I have to pray.

When it feels like the hard parts will never end, I can keep going.


I gave birth on a Good Friday to a baby girl.

That day I was broken and I was laid low. My life changed forever.

I am continually growing into a mother. I never was ready.

But, here we are. You are taller than me and you have outgrown my shoes.

I still have much to learn and I am so thankful that you are teaching me things no one else ever could.

You. My Daughter.

There are things I will never be able to teach you, but know this that we have to bend down low just as the boughs in this ice storm.





You are out knocking down icicles, in my boots, and I am in here, thinking of how you love life and people. Your smile brightens up your face and your life brings rays of sunshine to many.

After an ice storm in the spring, we will celebrate you! You want waffles with strawberries and whipped cream. And tacos for dinner. And lots of homemade doughnuts.



The sun is to shine tomorrow and we hope to go for a hike. I'll watch you as you run through the wood and your eye catches all the beauty around you. My eye will watch the beauty that you have become and pray that as you saunter into your last year of 'childhood' that you will remember these twelve truths.

::

Life is hard, but you know the victory is already won.

Life will break you, but you, in Christ, are strong.

Life gets ugly, but you are always beautiful.

Life may leave you feeling empty, but you are always loved.

When you are afraid, remember you are never alone.

When you want to give up, keep going.

When you think someone else can do it better, do your best.

When you feel silly, be yourself and don't worry what others may be thinking of you.

Remember to breath deep and dream big.

Remember to fix your eyes on things unseen.

Remember to never stop praying, always choose joy, and in everything give thanks.

Remember to love the Lord your God will all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.



*****

Linking in with the gang writing at Five Minute Friday at Lisa-Jo's place. I didn't at all keep the first rule this time. Once I started, I kept on going, so thankful for the gift of my daughter and the privilege I have to be her mother. Words are never enough!

This week the prompt is: Here 

Officially, the rules are:

Five Minute Friday1. Write for 5 minutes
2. Link up at Lisa-Jo's  and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community...




16 comments:

  1. Oh, I love the pictures and your words. Happy Birthday to your beautiful daughter.

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  2. This is stunningly beautiful. I hope your daughter reads this in 5 years time, 10 years time, whatever, but I hope she reads it and tells you what it means to her....cos this is just such a treasure trove of a post.

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  3. This is SO beautiful! I agree with mrsbrownkiwi completely!

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  4. Wow, just wow. Your photos are breath-taking, and the story you weave here of the waiting and the sudden arrival and the pain of birthing and the incredible joys of the life that came... this is precious. The words you leave here for your daughter are treasures. You have a beautiful Mama heart. Thank you. ~ from FMF

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  5. Oh so beautiful. Oh so heartfelt! Love your love for your girl!

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  6. Love this! We definitely are never ready to be mothers. Ever.

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  7. Every part of this was simply beautiful! We are never ready for this precious gift He gives us of being a mom. I'm so grateful that He is with us through it all. This really was amazing. Thank you for sharing.

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  8. So heartfelt...I can see your tears and love for your little 12 year old girl! She is blessed to have you...This post was beautiful! I love how even though she is 12 - I can still see the look of a little girl in her face! :) Rachel

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  9. This brought tears to my eyes Rebekah!!! you have a beautiful daughter who has a huge heart just like her Mama!!! I know Larissa will cherish this someday soon and it will bring tears to her eyes as well!!!

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  10. Birthday blessings to your lovely daughter.

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  11. I just found Five Minute Friday today, for the first time. I decide to do it! It's now added to my over-busy calendar. But I'm super excited. Yours was the first image I clicked o, and boy am I glad. You are an amazing writer!

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  12. So very thankful for the blessings the Lord bestows on us and all your loving words graciously left here are truly appreciated!

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  13. So beautiful, Rebekah. Your photos, and your words. (And YOU!)

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  14. Dear Rebekah
    I missed FMF last week for we were visiting family. I am so glad you also linked this post at Jennifer's for even though I am a LOT older than your daughter, I needed to hear those twelve tips today; not Friday! Thank you. With my second child, I also spent the nearly the whole time at home for the nurse at hospital told me it was bladder infection. When the "bladder infection" needed treatment, according to myself, he turned out to be my little angel!
    Blessings

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